My last few articles have
focused on various end-of-life issues that were made very
real to me due my mother-in-law’s recent death. In this
article, we’ll discuss the simple steps you can take that
will make dividing your personal possessions easier on your
family.
In many cases, the division of personal assets gives rise to
family conflicts and disputes. There’s the family china, the
furniture, clothes, guns, jewelry and other collectibles.
The disposition of these items is often handled in a Will or
Living Trust with a statement such as “divide my personal
possessions equally among my children”. But this isn’t very
specific and can easily create disagreement.
The death of a loved one is always very emotional. Personal
possessions take on greater significance than they ever had
before. Before your death they were just knick-knacks, now
they’re pieces of you that your loved ones will cling to in
their time of loss. Your old rocking chair, string of pearls
or favorite hunting rifle become poignant reminders of good
times and pleasant memories.
They’ve lost you, but they don’t want to lose what you left
behind. Anger, greed, resentment, past injustices, and more
all come to the surface, mixed with the loss, shock and
grief of death. In normal circumstances, these emotions
would be easily controlled. But when combined with the grief
of loss, things can be said and done that would make a soap
opera producer blush.
Everyone has heard of families locked in legal battles for
years over who gets what. Brothers and sisters refuse to
talk to each other ever again because they didn’t get what
they thought they deserved. Prized possessions quickly
disappear as heirs go through your home, taking what they
want before the others get their chance. Suspicions run
high, every action comes under close scrutiny, and there’s
more conniving and back stabbing than on an episode of
Survivor. But it doesn’t have to be this way.
The good news is that most of this emotional mess can be
easily avoided. Sure, your death will still be a traumatic
event, but by taking some important steps, you can greatly
minimize any confusion and strife.
Instead of disposing of your personal possessions as a group
in your Will or Living Trust, I suggest that you create a
list separately and have your Will or Living Trust refer to
it. Your attorney can help. By having a separate list it
will be easy for you to keep it up to date as your situation
or desires change, without having to update your entire
Will. It is important that you sign and date it, though.
For example, one deceased client made a list of specific
bequests shortly before her death. She even had a niece type
up the list and date it. But she didn’t sign it. As a
result, her wishes won’t be carried out unless all of her
beneficiaries agree to them. Simply signing the list in this
situation would have ensured her wishes were carried out.
In order to facilitate your wishes being carried out, it is
also important that your possessions are properly
safeguarded until they are divided. Protecting and
safeguarding your assets is usually the job of your
executor. Many times, though, the person you named as
executor doesn’t know it or isn’t aware that it is their
responsibility to protect your assets.
So I suggest you let the person you named know they are your
executor. Let them know the location of your Will or Living
Trust and where you keep the list that details how you want
your personal possessions divided. Explain to them that you
want them to safeguard your possessions so they can go to
the person you’ve name instead of the first person to take
them!
My mother-in-law is a great example. Knowing she had
terminal cancer, she sat down with her family and explained
how her possessions were to be divided. She let them know
the location of her list. As difficult as the meeting was,
it prevented countless problems after her death.
If you have a specific question or would like more
information give me a call toll-free at 1-877-827-1463 or go
to www.guardingyourwealth.com. You can also reach me by
email at jeff@guardingyourwealth.com. I will be happy to
help you in any way I can.
Mr. Voudrie is a Certified Financial Planner and the
President of Legacy Planning Group, Inc., a Private Wealth
Management firm in Johnson City, TN.
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